You and Family

Questions & Answers about your Family

Q:        I bet you have met lots of survivors of bad families

A:        Yes.  I use the 12 type Enneagram to explain the family dysfunction

Q:        Does it matter what parent types we had?

A:        Greatly!  Two Lunar type parents.  This gives you a family being run by two adult children.

Q:        My mother was very controlling and critical.  My father very loving.  Always laughing.

A:        Sounds like a Mars type mother, Jupiter type father

Q:        My parents are highly intellectual.  Saturn type, right?

A:        Sounds like it.  Remember the importance of Venus type.  That’s where we go for emotional 1-to-1. Children need to feel loved.  Not just educated


2 Responses to Family

  • Diana says:

    This is really interesting – a different way of looking at family dynamics. Do you think a Venus type is really the ideal mother? I would say mine is more likely a Mercury Saturn hybrid.

    • Matthew Campling says:

      A developed Venus type would certainly be a loving, attentive mother. An undeveloped Venus type could display all the disadvantages – selfishness, vanity, total preoccupation with self to the exclusion of her children. A Venus type benefits from accessing some Mercury energy to give her the energy for all the things the mother finds herself doing for her children. A Mercury Saturn hybrid would be moving away from the emotion of Venus, towards the deep thinking of Saturn type . This might mean that the mother would be sincerely interested in supporting and developing the daughter’s intellect and definitely wanting her to self-actualise. Don’t forget that we have all the type energies within us, so the more developed the individual, the more they would be able to access, in this case, Venus type energy.

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Matthew Campling

Matthew Campling

Your 12 Type Enneagram host is London psychotherapist and author Matthew Campling. Matthew has written the first EVER book on this wonderful system ‘The 12 Type Enneagram: Know Your Type: Improve Your Life’ Published by and available from Watkins, selected bookshops and Internet suppliers including

Please click here for a sample chapter.